Overcoming (?!?) Lust
Are you among those who feel uncomfortable with someone saying, “I have overcome lust”? Does it come off sounding presumptuous, brassy and overconfident?
Might it even be contrary to Scripture and looking for trouble? Consider:
- “Let him who thinks he stands take heed lest he fall.” (1 Corinthians 10:12)
- “If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us.” (1 John 1:8)
- “I have no confidence in the flesh.” (Philippians 3:3)
I believe the answer depends on what is meant by the word “overcoming.”
So what does it mean to overcome lust?
To say that you have overcome lust means that you have gained victory over it—that it is not a habitual, life dominating sin in your life.
What does it not mean when we overcome lust?
- It does not mean that you no longer have lustful thoughts. You cannot eliminate thoughts of sin. Thought suppression is not a workable or biblical strategy. The key is to stop yourself from using thoughts to obtain illicit sexual gratification in your heart.
- It does not mean that you no longer have illicit sexual desires— that you will not experience desires that are misdirected. Such desires do not go away. The key here as with lustful thoughts that may lead you astray is that you not act on these desires by lusting in your heart. Gratifying desires and allowing an illicit sexual buzz is when you are sinning.
- It does not mean that you are not tempted to lust. Satan does not take a holiday. He will not stop probing or tempting us to sin sexually.
- It does not necessarily mean that you eliminate lust from your life. Perfectionism is not possible in this life. John is clear—even including himself—when he wrote. “If we say we have not sinned, we deceive ourselves” (1 John 1:8). The key here is that whenever we sin, we confess, repent and obtain forgiveness. We do not let any sin become a habitual problem.
The proper response to all sexual temptations including misdirected thoughts and desires is to recoil from them—to reject them—to flee from them. (1 Corinthians 6:18) This approach is available to all God’s children since He is faithful to provide the way of escape. (1 Corinthians 10:13)
If you have the opportunity to disciple children and new Christians, I urge you to address these principles frankly and clearly. By modeling and teaching what it means to overcome lust, you will equip them, strip away confusion and point them to a realistic, workable standard of how they are to live in a way that is pleasing to God in a dark and sin infested world.
“Walk in the Spirit and you will not fulfill the lusts of the flesh” (Galatians 5:16). It is the Spirit of God filling our lives that enables us to confidently and thankfully proclaim that we have overcome lust.
I C&P this from another site to offer what I feel is the true purpose of Christ’s words here:
Jesus was, in this passage, describing the futility of trying to live a perfect life according to the law, and thus the universal need for forgiveness and grace. Love your enemies, don’t call people fools, divorce is bad, etc.. No one but no one has ever lived perfectly according to the law — WHICH WAS THE POINT!
So, He said to a bunch of guys that the law says don’t commit adultery, but that if you really want to be perfectly pure, then you can’t even look lustfully. Unsaid, but understood by any guy, was “and you know you do that pretty much constantly, don’t you? In fact, Mark, would you please stop looking at Martha’s chest long enough for me to finish my point?”
This was an illustration of a point, not the creation of a new law. It’s weird how people don’t get that Jesus didn’t rebuke the Pharisees for legalism just to come in and make stricter, more-impossible laws.
The Bible is clear on sexual boundaries – simply put, ‘thou shall not have nookie with anyone than your spouse.’ And even secular psychologists are agreeing that pornography has detrimental effects on its users. But when you interpret, or teach, Jesus’s words on lust or anything else in such a way that it makes people associate guilt and shame with every sexual tingle, sensation, urge, dream, etc. it can have an extremely damaging effect on a person’s mind and walk with God. I speak from experience.
Thanks for your comment, Chris. I grew up and fully bought into the interpretation that you are presenting. Basically, this approach sets aside this and all teaching in the Sermon on the Mount and makes it mean something that Jesus did not say.
Fortunately, overcoming lust is not out of reach and we must do it if we are seeking to please God. Jesus spoke against legalism in the sense that he condemned those who sinned on the inside but acted righteous on the outside. Those who lust in their hearts and hide it are prime examples of this.
I just think that young Christian men would be much better off if they’d read something along the lines of what that man’s post said. Instead, many young men and women were taught sexual dissociation by modern-day Pharisees like Joshua Harris and Bill Gothard. I and other victims of such teachings wound up experiencing what some psychologists have said are the effects of sexual abuse!
Sexuality is something that is treated like a whole other entity in and of itself by the collective Church. I think the term “Let go and let God” has helped me. He’s the Architect and the Sculptor, and He can perfect all aspects of us over time.