“Anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.”
What should we make of Jesus’ well-known declaration? Though frequently dismissed as an unattainable standard, it prompts a vital question: Who is better qualified to offer guidance on such a pervasive and enslaving sin?
Recognizing the clarity and authority of Jesus’ teachings, let’s consider five reasons that Christians continue to struggle with lust:
1) Misunderstanding the nature of lust
The underlying sin of lust is the source of all other sexual sin, yet it is seldom explained in a way that is helpful. Rather than dealing with lust, the usual focus is on practices that grow from lust, like using pornography and engaging in illicit sex.
What exactly is sexual lust? Though we will never fully understand it, we can instantly recognize when it takes place. We engage in lust whenever we derive sexual pleasure from a source forbidden to us. This pleasure is the result of our brains releasing dopamine. This “feel good” neurochemical kicks in even when there is no visible evidence. The more we open the door to this illicit pleasure the more it becomes a powerfully addictive habit, seemingly out of our control. Go to Understanding Lust—a companion article—for a deeper look at how lust works.
Intentional interruption is the hallmark of those of us who overcome lust. When faced with a triggering image, thought, or situation, we choose to immediately halt the impulse and reject the temptation for gratification. This practice involves averting our gaze, redirecting our focus, or removing the source of temptation entirely. In every instance, we strive to maintain a pure heart.
Gaining an understanding of how lust functions paves the way for victory over it. Uprooting its deep-seated, addictive power requires turning from sin, seeking God’s forgiveness and strength, and diligently following the teaching of Jesus.
2) Refusing to believe that obedience is possible
Many men mistakenly believe that they are “hardwired” for lust, leading them to dismiss Jesus’ standard as unrealistic or contrary to human nature. However, the natural restraint we exercise toward family members—such as a sister or daughter—proves that lust is not an inevitable response. With God’s help, we can cultivate this same discipline toward every visual and mental stimulus, overcoming the impulse for improper sexual gratification.
As this truth takes root, we become acutely aware of when we cross the line. Being “in Christ” means that we are to consider ourselves dead to sin. Choosing to resist lust is a powerful way to live out this reality and experience God’s empowering grace. If you have struggled with lust for a long time, this approach may seem simplistic. However, rejecting a lifelong habit by obediently recoiling from the temptation to experience illicit pleasure is a remarkably effective first step toward lasting freedom.
Living in accordance with God’s laws strengthens us, aligning our lives with His divine purpose. Through faith, believers draw upon God’s power to remain steadfast and obedient to His Word. The Christian journey is designed for discovery and fulfillment, empowering us to realize our full potential in Christ. However, true flourishing is impossible while ensnared by lust, which relentlessly corrupts the mind at every opportunity.
With God’s strength, you too can overcome lust.
3) Thinking there is a better way
By addressing lust within the heart, Jesus was not ignoring external behaviors. Rather, His teaching points directly to the root of our struggle—the only place where the battle can be won.
Sadly, both secular society and the Church frequently counsel that harmful habits, such as pornography use, can be conquered through sheer determination.
To address unwanted behavior, experts frequently recommend counseling, support groups, and practical safeguards—such as internet filters or avoiding explicit media. However, external methods alone rarely reach the root of the issue. Unless one undergoes an internal transformation so that the heart consistently turns away from lust, cravings will remain persistent and overwhelming.
Managing bad behavior by substituting better behavior is an unsustainable plan for overcoming lust even when motivated by a desire to please God. Intensifying and increasing religious activity, such as prayer, scripture reading, and accountability is always a good idea. However, maintaining an outward appearance without an obedient heart fosters hypocrisy and increases vulnerability to temptation.
The Sermon on the Mount, in which Jesus taught about lust, concludes with a sobering warning, This comes in the form of a parable about a man who built his house on sand. To hear his words without obeying risks collapse when the inevitable storms of life arise. Conversely, if we obey His call for inner righteousness, we will be building on a secure foundation and remain steadfast in times of peril.
4) Not acknowledging the danger and dreadfulness of lust.
You may remain unconvinced, believing that a moderate level of lust is unavoidable, even while acknowledging the harm it causes. We are all familiar with the heartbreaking accounts of broken homes and ruined careers, yet few expect to experience such total devastation personally. Instead, the common tendency is to manage lust at a “safe” level—keeping it hidden and only retreating when it threatens to spiral out of control. In this state, lust functions less like a terminal illness and more like a chronic condition. However, nurturing it at any level inevitably results in significant and lasting damage.
This is because lust is a powerful and destructive force. When Christians harbor sexual fantasies, we risk becoming hypocritical—double-minded and unstable in our convictions. If we profess our faith and maintain a clean outward appearance while our inner lives remain compromised, we resemble the “dirty cups” Jesus spoke of. He knows our innermost thoughts. We are called to a level of purity where we would feel no shame in having others know them as well.
The most grievous consequence of lust is that it breaks the greatest commandment: to love God with all our heart, mind, and strength. By hijacking our thoughts and creative energy, lust redirects the focus that belongs to the Father toward sinful desires. Consequently, our walk with God becomes strained and our spiritual growth is stunted.
Our imaginations and intellectual faculties were designed for God’s kingdom and His divine purposes. Why surrender these gifts to sin? When we make room for lust, it asserts its power unexpectedly—often at the very moments we seek to draw closer to God. Knowing that freedom is available yet choosing to remain in bondage carries solemn implications.
We must not overlook the rest of Jesus’ teachings in Matthew 5. His provocative suggestion to pluck out our eyes if they lead to lust is intended to alarm us, and it would make perfect sense if our eyes were truly the problem. However, we know they are not. Instead, it is our determination to use our eyes as instruments for lust that is so grotesque in His sight and dangerous for us.
5) Lacking clear teaching and models of sexual purity.
While you may feel isolated in your struggle with this hidden sin, you are not alone. Statistics indicate that 75% of Christian men and 40% of Christian women consume pornography.
Although the approach to overcoming lust presented here is not widely taught in Christian circles, it is neither radical nor unprecedented. Those who walk closely with God instinctively recoil from internal temptation—a habit typically formed early in their spiritual lives. Because this discipline has become second nature to them, they may not realize how strange it seems to those who struggle. As a result, there is an urgent unmet need for clear instruction regarding the teachings of Jesus and how to submit to them.
For more than fifty years, I lived as a dedicated Christian before I truly grasped what it took to overcome lust. My personal history of struggle allows me to empathize deeply with those who feel frustrated and confused when their faith seems ineffective against lust.
I believe that those who have navigated the pitfalls of sin and found freedom are uniquely equipped to guide others. This desire is exemplified by David who, after being confronted by the prophet Nathan, sought a clean heart and vowed to teach others God’s ways so they might turn to Him. (Psalm 51:10-13).
Mentors need to demonstrate that lust can be conquered—that it is only one of many sins from which we can be liberated. The goal is to model both personal victory and authentic transparency, showing that freedom is attainable. By upholding St. Peter’s exhortation to “abstain from fleshly lusts which war against the soul,” we guide others toward lasting liberty. Ultimately, the core Biblical message regarding sexual sin calls us to uncompromising purity and freedom from the bondage of sin.
As emphasized by the teachings of Jesus and the apostles, there is a constant temptation to retreat into legalism, which substitutes outward rules for genuine obedience and masks an unrighteous heart. Observing a slippery set of man-made rules cannot eliminate the lustful look.
True righteousness is established at a deeper level where we stop deceiving ourselves and turn from sinful thoughts and actions. Only then will our inner thoughts be acceptable to our all-seeing Father, and only then will the world recognize the reality of His transforming power.
If this teaching resonates with you, I encourage you to read the book Overcoming Lust, which has helped many. It is available for you to download from this website or to read online at no cost.
